


It Turns Out, Some Folks Just Don't Like Baby Talk

by TheseusInTheMaze



Series: ABDL Unsolved [3]
Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: ABDL, Diapers, Forced Eye Contact, Frotting, M/M, Mild Freak Out, Overstimulation, Polyamory, Teasing, Tickle torture, Tickling, sexual age play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-20
Updated: 2018-01-20
Packaged: 2019-03-07 09:05:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13431453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheseusInTheMaze/pseuds/TheseusInTheMaze
Summary: Shane finds out a thing about Ryan.





	It Turns Out, Some Folks Just Don't Like Baby Talk

**Author's Note:**

> I'm glad y'all are enjoying these so much! This is, as always, gross as hell!

“You are, like, disgustingly adorable, you know that?”

Ryan, who had been yawning and rubbing his eyes, paused, looking over at Shane.

“Excuse me?”

“Like, okay,” said Shane, slumping down in his chair to get more comfortable, “part of it is the fact that we fuck regularly, so I’ve seen you mid-orgasm, I’ve seen you falling asleep, waking up -”

“Shane,” Ryan said, making frantic “quit it!” hand gestures and glancing around their empty office. 

Nobody was here to witness this burst of sappiness, but still. 

“But at the same time, you’re like… disgustingly cute.”

Shane grinned at Ryan, a full on delighted smile. 

“Shut up,” Ryan mumbled, and he made a dismissive gesture.

“Maybe it’s because I know what you look like when you’re diapered,” Shane added, almost as an afterthought. 

He only turned a bit red at the “d” word. 

“Well, I know what you look like diapered too,” Ryan shot back.

Now Shane turned even redder - his pale complexion didn’t really do him any favors, when it came to these kinds of situations.

“I’m not denying that I’m cute,” said Shane.

“Well, neither am I,” said Ryan.

“I never said you were denying it,” said Shane. “Although you kind of are.”

“I’m not denying I’m cute,” Ryan said, although yeah, he was blushing now, “I’m just not used to… spontaneous comments on how cute I am or am not.”

“What can I say? You make me uncharacteristically sappy,” said Shane.

“Oh geez,” mumbled Ryan, and he leaned back in his chair, his arms behind his head.

“It’s all your fault,” said Shane. “You’re adorable and you’re my Little, you’re just bringing out all of these nice instincts in me.”

“You could stand to let them come out when we’re filming,” Ryan grumbled. “Especially in the haunted houses.”

“Nonsense,” said Shane. “Where’d the fun be in that? Anyway, the viewers would be able to tell.”

Ryan couldn’t really argue with that, but he still stuck his tongue out at Shane, for the principle of the thing.

Shane snorted, and ruffled Ryan’s hair. 

Ryan pinched Shane in the side in retaliation. 

“You don’t wanna start on that,” Shane warned.

“Don’t I, though?” 

“You really don’t,” said Shane, and now he was advancing on Ryan with wriggling fingers.

… uh oh.

“Shane, if you tickle me, I might pee my pants,” Ryan said, aware that he was possibly giving up one of his bigger weakness. 

He wasn’t entirely sure if it was true, but… there was a chance it was! 

And that would be bad!

Especially at work.

“I guess…,” Shane said, and he leaned back, clearly disappointed.

Then he grinned like a shark.

“Oh god,” Ryan said, trying to scoot his chair just a little bit back. “Dude, quit it.”

“Quit what?”

“That look.” said Ryan.

“What look?”

“You look like a fucking shark,” said Ryan.

“You mean the apex predator?”

“Not this again,” groaned Ryan.

And then Shane jabbed him in the side with one long, pointy finger, and Ryan squealed, shoving at Shane.

Shane cackled, taking the shove and just… standing there.

Bastard.

“You’re cute,” Shane said. “Just accept it.”

He put a big hand on top of Ryan’s head, and then he stretched, his back making slightly alarming cracking and popping noises. 

“That can _not_ be healthy,” said Ryan, as he stood up as well, stretching. 

“Probably not,” Shane said in an agreeable tone of voice. “You wanna get dinner.”

“What’s even open?”

“Probably Chipotle,” said Shane.

“Don’t they close earlier?”

“Nah, the new one is open late,” said Shane. “Shall we?”

“Sounds good,” said Ryan.

* * * 

“You shouldn’t have told me about the tickling thing,” Shane said later, as they both ate their burritos. 

“I know that already,” Ryan grumbled.

“Because, like, now I’m thinking about fucking you at work,” Shane said, as if that was a thing that people said.

Ryan coughed, hard enough that Shane had to reach over and slap him on the back.

Which didn’t help anything, but Ryan could appreciate the thought, if nothing else.

“You’ve thought about fucking me at work before,” Ryan said, keeping his voice low, for obvious reasons. “You sent me a rather explicit text message, then went to jerk off in the bathroom.”

“Well, yeah, but that was before i realized the whole… you know….”

Ryan raised an eyebrow.

“The whole?”

Shane was blushing now, which was satisfying.

“The whole diaper thing,” Shane said.

“Oh,” said Ryan.

“I was thinking of you being diapered,” Shane said quietly. “I’d sit you on the desk, take your pants off, and then I’d lie you back on the desk -”

“How am I fitting on the desk? Let alone to lie me back,” Ryan interrupted.

He had a boner.

Shane probably had even more of a boner.

“It’s a fantasy, shush,” Shane said, making a dismissive gesture. “So I’d lie you back, and I’d untape you, and then I’d wipe you down, and I’d throw out the wet diaper, and I’d put a clean one under you….”

Shane’s expression was dreamy, and he was speaking so quietly that Ryan had to lean in to hear him.

He was blushing dark, dark red.

“You forgot the powder,” Ryan said, because of course he did.

“Well, yes, I forgot the powder,” Shane snapped. “I can’t fuck you if you’re covered in baby powder. The powder absorbs lube!”

“... oh,” said Ryan.

“I do my research,” Shane said, and he sounded slightly offended. 

“Oh, obviously,” said Ryan. 

“Exactly,” said Shane. “Now, where was I?”

“Uh,” said Ryan, “you were talking about the clean one.”

“Right,” said Shane. “I’d spread your legs up, and I’d lube your hole up, and I’d slide my dick into you as deep as it would go.” 

“Oh,” Ryan squeaked.

He actually _squeaked_ , and that was… awkward. 

How could it manage to be so damn awkward?

But also vaguely sexy via the awkward?

Only fucking Ryan Bergara could do that.

Probably.

Oh god.

His dick was throbbing in his pants, and his own hands were shaking, as he took a big bite of his burrito.

“I’d offer to blow you in the bathroom,” Shane said, in that same chill tone of voice. 

Ryan didn’t start coughing this time, at least.

He just flushed harder.

“So why don’t you?”

Ryan swallowed before he spoke, at least.

“I don’t think we’d both fit,” said Ryan. 

“Hm?”

“The bathroom here is tiny,” said Shane. 

“Oh,” said Ryan. “Why? Have you tried to bring someone in for a liaison?”

“Not even,” said Shane. “I just wanted to pee. I barely fit in there by myself, let alone with someone else.”

“Maybe you should go around diapered,” Ryan said, trying to keep his tone as neutral as possible.

Shane blushed dark red.

“I’d never go to work diapered,” Shane said quietly. “For, you know, obvious reasons.”

“Because you’re gonna have a huge boner all day, duh,” said Ryan, enjoying the turned tables.

“That too,” said Shane. “I’d probably spend the whole day smelling like pee anyway. Although….” He looked at Ryan thoughtfully. 

“No way,” Ryan said. “That would be the day I’d be pulled into some crossfit bullshit or have to dress up in weird clothes or… something.”

“You know, I can’t really argue with you on that,” said Shane. “You’ve got the worst luck.”

“My luck isn’t too bad,” said Ryan.

“It’s pretty bad,” said Shane. 

“... it could be worse?”

“Don’t tempt fate,” said Shane.

“I thought you didn’t believe in fate,” Ryan teased, nudging Shane with his foot. 

“I don’t,” said Shane, and he trapped Ryan’s foot between his two, just holding on to it. “But there’s not believing in fate, and there’s standing on top of a skyscraper in wet copper armor shouting ‘all gods are idiots.””

“You stole that from Terry Pratchett,” Ryan accused.

“I didn’t steal it,” Shane said. “I’m just borrowing it.”

“We’re both journalists,” Ryan said. “You have to properly attribute when you use someone else’s words.”

“You didn’t give me a chance to,” Shane countered.

“... I can’t argue with that,” said Ryan. 

Ryan grinned.

Then he looked thoughtful. 

“So do you really pee yourself when you get tickled?”

“I mean,” Ryan said, “as you’ve, uh, as you’ve seen, I don’t have the greatest control over my bladder.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t come to the whole diaper thing sooner,” Shane said.

“I don’t usually get tickled or startled that often,” Ryan countered.

Shane gave him a Look.

“... I usually have more control when I’m on camera,” Ryan mumbled.

“Oh,” said Shane. “So if I don’t want you to piss yourself when I tickle you, I should just keep the camera on you?”

“Why are you talking about tickling me as if it’s a thing that’s just… gonna happen?”

“Because it’s a foregone conclusion,” Shane said breezily, and he took another big bite of his burrito. 

He was putting the thing away like nobody’s business.

“What?!” 

“I mean, unless that’s a thing you really don’t want,” Shane added, and he looked askance. “Shit, sorry, I’m being pushy. I’m sorry.”

He let go of Ryan’s foot, and leaned over to pat Ryan on the knee. 

“No, no, it’s fine,” Ryan said quickly, and he grabbed Shane’s hand. “It’s fine. I promise.”

“You sure?”

“Totally sure,” said Ryan. “It’s just, uh… it’s kinda fun, putting up a token protest. Since i know if I wanted to actually say no, it’d be a no.”

“Understood,” said Shane. “Makes sense.”

“Okay,” said Ryan, and then he took another bite of his burrito. 

Shane grinned at Ryan.

Ryan grinned back, in spite of himself. 

They tended to needle each other, but… fuck, Ryan was a lucky guy.

* * *

And then it was the weekend again, and Ryan was at Shane’s apartment.

Shane’s girlfriend was going to spend the weekend with her other boyfriend, and she gave Ryan a hug on the way out.

She looked very happy.

Ryan glanced at Shane, who was watching after her with a fond expression.

“You gonna be okay?”

Shane had never really been known for being jealous, but… well, we all have the stuff that makes us nervous.

“Oh yeah,” said Shane. “Totally. I’m happy she’s happy.”

“I’m… I’m getting there,” Ryan said, rubbing the back of his neck and dropping his duffel bag on the floor.

Shane raised an eyebrow.

“Like… I’m happy that my girlfriend is happy,” said Ryan, “and I’m happy that you and your girlfriend are happy. I just need to kinda… untangle the fact that sometimes they’re happy by other people.”

“Huh,” said Shane. “Well, that’s really mature of you.”

“I do my best,” said Ryan, stretching, then putting his hands behind his head.

Shane was looking Ryan up and down with an openly leering expression.

“You certainly do,” Shane drawled.

Ryan blushed, looking to the side.

He’d showered and shaved before he’d arrived, and he’d even worn nicer clothes, even though it was a bit silly to do so.

Shane was gonna dress him up, regardless.

That was part of the fun - Shane got to dress Ryan up, choose Ryan’s food, the whole nine yards.

Shane was a bit of a control freak sometimes, and Ryan was a neurotic mess sometimes, and so the two of them meshed together pretty well.

“We should get you diapered,” said Shane, crouching in front of Ryan, his hands on Ryan’s knees. “I got you new ones.”

“Already? Didn’t you just get a new pack?”

“I did,” said Shane, “but these are a new brand, and they’re so cute. I had to.”

“You’re gonna go bankrupt buying diapers,” said Ryan, petting Shane’s shaggy hair out of his face.

“I’ve got more self control than that,” said Shane. 

Ryan raised an eyebrow. 

Shane raised one back, and then he patted Ryan’s thighs. “C’mon. Let’s get you dipped up, before you pee on my couch.”

“I’m not gonna pee on your couch,” Ryan said, aware that there was a note of a whine in his voice, not really caring.

Shane liked it when he got a little whiny, when they were doing this kind of scene.

“Well, obviously not, because I’m gonna diaper you,” Shane said, as if that was the most obvious thing in the world.

Ryan rolled his eyes, but he let himself be pulled up and towards the bedroom.

* * * 

The new diapers were very, very thick, and printed with cute little jungle animals.

They crinkled whenever Ryan moved, and Ryan just lay on the bed for a minute, staring at the ceiling, as Shane fiddled with things, getting them situated.

“I really wanna tickle you right now,” Shane said. 

“... tickle me?”

Ryan looked over the curve of his belly at Shane, who was dusting the powder off of his hands.

“Yep!”

“... I kick when I’m tickled. And, like, thrash around a lot.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“But you also pee yourself.”

“... I have been known to, yes,” said Ryan.

“Well,” said Shane, “I’m sure I can find a work around. I just need to think a bit.”

He patted Ryan on the thigh.

Ryan sat up, slowly, then stood up.

He submitted to Shane pulling the back of the diaper up to line it up, although he made a face.

“I always feel like you’re trying to give me a wedgie,” he told Shane. 

“A diaper wedgie?” Shane rolled his eyes. “That would defeat the whole purpose of the thing in the first place.”

Ryan shrugged, trying to pull his shirt down a little lower, to hide the diaper.

No dice - the waistband went all the way up to his navel, hugging his hips, making him waddle and rounding his butt. 

“You look adorable,” Shane said, and he was licking his lips as he said it.

He had an obvious erection, and he pressed down on it with the heel of his hand, almost absently, paying much more attention to Ryan. 

“Yeah?”

“Oh yeah,” said Shane, and then he was grabbing Ryan’s butt. “Wanna go play in the living room?”

“What kinda play?”

“I’ve got trains,” said Shane.

“Okay,” Ryan said. “I like trains.”

… this was awkward.

But then again, trying to be Little in general tended to just be awkward.

He might as well just enjoy it, whatever it happened to be.

* * * 

Sometimes, Ryan suspected that Shane liked being Big as an excuse to mess around with toys and be silly, while still being bossy and in charge.

He seemed more into the train thing than Ryan was. 

“So we can make the tracks go all around the room,” Shane was saying, as he unloaded the tracks from their box, “and then we can put your trains all over!”

Ryan nodded, not really paying attention. 

“Or…,” Shane said, in the same tone of voice, “I could bend you over the couch and fuck you ‘til you forgot your own name.”

“That sounds - wait, what?”

Ryan’s brain caught up with his brain.

“You bored, buddy?”

“... little bit,” said Ryan.  
“You don’t like trains as much as you thought, huh?”

“I think I have trouble enjoying kiddy stuff,” said Ryan, looking down. “I, uh, I worry it makes me a bad Little.”

“I worry that sometimes I’m a bad Big,” said Shane.

“Yeah? You’re a great Big!”

“Even though I tease you and don’t call you things like my little prince?”

Ryan wrinkled his nose.

"I think it'd be weird if you did that," he admitted. 

"You don't wanna be Daddy's little treasure?"

Shane was putting on a cutesy baby talk voice, and Ryan rolled his eyes.

Shane was being annoying.

Of course he was.

"If you keep doing that, I'm gonna bite your face," he told Shane.

"Are you now?"

Shane was... smirking, which was always a bit unsettling.

He was also settling back against the couch, his long legs in front of him. 

"Yes! I will!"

"Well, I guess I shouldn't do it then, huh?"

"You shouldn't!"

Shane looked entirely too pleased with himself.

"Does Daddy's little prince want to come sit in Daddy's lap?"

Ryan blew a loud, wet raspberry, crossing his arms across his chest and glaring at Shane.

Shane grinned widely, reaching out to Ryan.

"I'm sorry," he told Ryan. "I couldn't resist."

"Well, okay," said Ryan, and he scooted closer, until Shane was pulling Ryan into his lap, Ryan straddling Shane.

"So I was remembering something you told me," Shane said, his tone casual.

His hands were on Ryan's plastic covered hips, and he was grinding his hips forward lazily. 

"I tell you a lot of things," Ryan said, trying not to squirm too much. 

"You told me that you flail when you're being tickled," said Shane, and his hands were begin to creep up Ryan's sides.

Ryan was trying not to squirm.

"I'm still gonna squirm if I'm sitting in your lap," Ryan said, and there was a touch of nervous laughter in the back of his throat.

"Wrap your legs around me," Shane said, and he was using his bossy Daddy voice.

Oh _god_.

"You just want me to be closer to you," Ryan accused, but he did as he was told.

His heels were digging into Shane's lower back, which couldn't have been that comfortable, but Shane wasn't complaining.

"Is that such a bad thing?" 

"... no," said Ryan.

"Now," said Shane, "hands behind your head."

"Behind my head?"

"Right," said Shane.

"What are you going to do?"

Ryan did as instructed, aware of the way his shirt was riding up, baring his vulnerable stomach, and the fact that now his even more vulnerable armpits were accessible.

"I'm going to tickle you, and I'm _also_ not going to get kicked," said Shane, as if that was the most obvious answer in the world.

"Oh," said Ryan. "But... if you tickle me, I'm probably gonna... you know, uh...."

"Wet?" 

Shane licked his lips, and his cock twitched in his pants, right up against Ryan's thigh. 

"... yeah," said Ryan.

"Well," said Shane, and he grabbed Ryan's butt, which crinkled. "At least we're prepared for that eventuality, huh?"

Ryan flushed, and he tried to stay still, his fingers laced together, digging into the back of his own head. 

"I guess so," Ryan said. 

"Oh yeah," said Shane, and he kept eye contact as he began to wriggle his fingers along Ryan's ribs. 

Ryan's head tilted back, and he began to laugh, a breathless, shaking thing.

"Eyes," Shane snapped.

"W-w-w-what?"

"Eyes on me," said Shane, and he took Ryan's chin in his hand, forcing eye contact.

Ryan kept eye contact, as Shane went back to tickling.

It was gentle tickling... mostly.

But Ryan was already starting to shake, his eyes on Shane's, and they were very big, this close up.

Shane was grinning, and he was still tickling, as Ryan whined in the back of his throat.

"How you doing in there?"

Shane's fingers were sliding under Ryan's shirt, and his fingers were cold, which made it even _more_ ticklish, which just wasn't fair!

"Why are your hands cold?"

"My circulation is crap," said Shane, and now he was going for the armpits, wriggling his fingers, and Ryan's arms were shaking from the strain of not moving. 

"You should have that fixed," Ryan said, not really aware of what was coming out of his mouth, just aware that it was coming.

"I'll get on that," Shane said absently, and then he was tickling - full on tickling - Ryan's armpits, and Ryan was laughing.

He was laughing so hard that his stomach was beginning to hurt, and he was trying to stay still, but that was the hardest part, because how could he stay still, when he was being tickled like this?

But not, he was being held in Shane's gaze, and he wasn't supposed to move, and he was trying his best not to move, but he was being tickled, and it was all so... it was just....

Ryan started crying.

He really didn't mean to - he wasn't someone to just burst into tears out of nowhere.

But his cackling turned into sobbing at some point, and there were tears dripping down his face, as Shane kept tickling him, kept up the eye contact, and Shane was grinning in that slightly unsettling way.

And then Shane's long arms were wrapping around Ryan, and Ryan shuddered, because he needed... he needed space.

He shoved Shane away, lying flat on the floor, and then he caught Shane's hurt expression, as he caught his breath. 

Shit.

"I need to... I need to not touch anything for a few minutes," Ryan got out. "Sorry."

He closed his eyes, still breathing heavily, and he reached out his hand, so that his fingers were against Shane's.

"Sorry," said Shane, and he sounded... well, pretty hangdog. 

"It's okay," said Ryan. "I think I just got kinda... maybe if we try doing something like that again, maybe make it less intense."

"Right," said Shane. Then, quietly; "Are you mad at me?"

"No," Ryan said, and he sat up, leaning against Shane, holding Shane's hand and squeezing his long fingers. "No, I'm not mad. Just, uh... I got overwhelmed."

"I'm sorry I'm not, like, a super daddy," said Shane, and he kissed Ryan awkwardly on the temple.

Ryan shifted, so that he could fully face Shane, and he kissed Shane, sweet and long and deep.

Shane kissed him back, and then it was a wash of warmth and heat, as they pressed closer together, and limbs became entangled.

When Ryan came back to himself - more or less - he was sitting in Shane's lap again, and Shane was shoving the diaper down, trying to unbuckle his pants one handed. 

"Hold on," Ryan said, and he grabbed at Shane's zipper, pushing it down, then fishing around inside, grabbing Shane's dick.

Shane moaned, humping into Ryan's fist, sliding his cock against Ryan's.

"Good boy," Shane panted, and he was kissing Ryan intermittently, then jerking them off together again, as Ryan held on to Shane's shoulders. 

Ryan had to cum, and he had to pee, and he was... he wanted something else.

"Tickle me," Ryan blurted out.

"What?"

Shane, even in the throes of passion, could look nonplussed.

Impressive!

"Tickle me, please, I'll...."

Ryan wrapped his hands around Shane's cock, around his own, keeping them together. 

"You _want_ to be tickled?"

"Yeah," said Ryan. "Just no, like, eye contact like before, okay?"

"Okay," said Shane, and then he was tickling along Ryan's ribs, and the diaper was rustling as Ryan jerked them both off, a bit clumsily, but fuck it, his own hand felt so good, the slide of Shane's cock against his own felt so good, it was all almost too much. 

Almost.

The tickling wormed its way through Ryan's nerves, across his skin, and then Ryan was cumming, and he was shuddering as his hips jerked forward, and Shane's cock was beginning to swell as well, and then Shane was cumming across Ryan's knuckles, across the front of the diaper, across Ryan's stomach.

"Fuck," Shane gasped, and his fingers stilled, his forehead against Ryan's. "Holy... fuck."

"I know, right?"

Ryan was still shaking.

He had maybe thirty seconds before the messages his bladder were sending his brain were received, but by then it was too late.

He was pissing.

He pissed across Shane's stomach, down the outside of the diaper, into Shane's lap.

Shane looked from his lap up into Ryan's eyes, an eyebrow up. 

"Really?"

"... I did tell you that if you tickle me, I'll pee myself," Ryan said, defensive.

"I guess I'll just have to not let your dick out," Shane said, as if that was a reasonable thing to say.

"That's not fair!"

"Neither is me having to do laundry," said Shane. 

Ryan pouted, and Shane kissed him. 

"Let's go take a shower," said Ryan. 

"Sounds good," said Shane. "Daddy's little prince made a big mess!"

Ryan pinched Shane in the side, and Shane howled, which got Shane tickling Ryan again, which got Ryan peeing some more.

So, not entirely the best outcome, especially with all the mopping Ryan was going to have to do.

But totally worth it.

**Author's Note:**

> Like this fic?
> 
> Want me to write you something like it, or something completely different?
> 
> Come talk to me on my tumblr, theseusinthemaze.tumblr.com


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